Just like that, week 5 of the NFL season is in the books and there is much to discuss.

It all began on Thursday night down in Tampa, where the Patriots snuck away with an ugly 19-14 W over the Buccaneers. Far more intriguing than anything that happened during the game itself, was the line moving from 5.5 most of the week, down to 4.5 Thursday evening, leaving pre-mature betters confused and disheartened.

As for the game, this one featured a slew of Missed FGs from the Bucs, (what else is new) which ultimately cost them a chance to win at the end. This franchise can not find a kicker, and will surely look to bring in some guys this week to try and replace former Jet legend, Nick Folk. It is unclear if Raymond James is a tough place to kick, or the team is cursed, but Folk will shortly be joining the long line of Ex Bucs kickers seeking new employment. Almost as ugly as the kicking game was the Patriots offense who struggled to get much going all night. Despite finishing with over 300 passing yards, Brady seemed a little off in the game which included his first interception of the season, and a few other uncharacteristic throws. He did have his moments, including two absolute dimes dropped into the bread baskets of Brandin Cooks and James White down the sideline, and continues to make Chris Hogan look like a young Randy Moss. Gronk was missed and will hopefully be good to go following the bye (Jets) next week.

Maybe I shouldn’t be cracking Jets jokes quite yet, as they reeled off their third straight against the always pathetic Cleveland Browns. Here we are heading into Week 6 and the New York Football Jets sit in a 3 way tie atop the AFC East. There is absolutely nothing to report from this game and I just feel bad for those of us who live in New York and were forced to watch it on Fox when we tuned in at 1 PM to watch real NFL teams.


Speaking of feeling bad for New York, I don’t have much sympathy for the New York Giants, but I do feel badly for Odell Beckham Jr.  America’s most dramatic human being was carted off the field Sunday with a broken ankle after being absolutely hung out to dry by Eli Manning. If I am Odell, I am suing the QB for all he’s got for putting me in a spot like that on what should have been a routine pitch and catch. It sucks for the NFL because OBJ is such as fun player to watch and it sucks for the Giants because there is a very realistic chance that they go 0-16 this year. This really looked like their game to win against a fellow 0-4 opponent on their home turf but they could not get it done, and losing their only All Pro caliber player on offense will make it impossible for this team to score points. I for one have never considered Eli to be an Elite quarterback, but the two time Super Bowl champ is an absolute shell of his former self. It is way past time for the Gmen to find his heir apparent, and rid the NFL of the Manning brothers once and for all.

In other quarterbacks that should just retire already news, the Pittsburgh Steelers got absolutely toasted on their home turf by the Jacksonville Jaguars of all teams. Big Ben Roethlisberger completed almost as many passes to Jags players as Blake Bortles did and threw 2 more Touchdowns to Jacksonville than their own quarterback. The only silver lining for Ben would be that 3 of his 5 picks on the day were not returned for Scores. After the game, Ben wondered aloud whether he was still good enough to play quarterback in this league, and from a fan perspective, the answer is pretty clearly, no. It remains to be seen whether Ben is done or not, but this post game press conference was a far cry from his last one which consisted of him calling out his best player for being a distraction. No word on whether throwing 5 interceptions is more of a distraction than a cooler toss. It is confusing to see a team with so much offensive fire power struggle so mightily but with losses to the Bears and Jags already this year, it has become even more clear how incompetent of a football coach Mike Tomlin is. The Jaguars are now 3-2 for the first time in franchise history, and going into Pittsburgh and dominating like they did is extremely impressive.

Also impressive across the state of Pennsylvania is Carson Wentz and the Philadelphia Eagles. I was reminded about the great history of this franchise on Thursday night after re-watching Invincible and reminded how all-time that movie is. In real life, North Dakotas favorite son has emerged as a premiere quarterback in the league throwing 4 more touchdowns yesterday. Though we do not care about your fantasy football teams, 2 QB league owners with Wentz such as myself have to be thrilled with his play all year long. He may very well be the best quarterback in the NFC East right now and perhaps on his way to Elite consideration.

Of course no one in the history of football commentary has mentioned the NFC East without following it up with some Cowboys talk, so let’s talk about the thriller that took place in Big D late yesterday afternoon, with the Packers in town. If we are talking about Elite quarterback play, there is no one playing even close to the same level that Aaron Rodgers is on right now. We know he is great, but he is absolutely out of his mind right now, even for his standards. Despite a banged up O-Line and spotting the Boys a 21-6 lead, Rodgers was brilliant, willing his team back and capping it off with yet another game winning drive at the gun. Even Rodgers, who is generally laid back, was completely fired up after his game winning pass to Devontae Adams, and it was great to see Adams back on the field just one week after Danny Trevetheon’s attempted murder.

Jerry Jones took another L after the game, when he claimed that any Cowboys player who kneels for the anthem going forward will be not play. It is incomprehensible that the same man who employed Greg Hardy and continues to pay Ezekiel Elliot is now drawing the line in the sand of things he won’t tolerate at peaceful protests. It would be extremely interesting to see one of his star players like Dak or Zeke take a knee, and see if Jerry had the stones to back up his big mouth.

Another Dummy with a big mouth plays quarterback for the Carolina Panthers, who had an impressive win in Detroit yesterday. If you live under a rock, you missed national news made by Newton who laughed at a thoughtful question from a female reporter, and told her it was “funny to hear coming from a female”. Cam, who has been outspoken about social issues in the past, apparently has no respect from Women. We can look at many of the decisions he has made in the past to know that he is not the sharpest tool in the shed, as he was booted off of the same College football team that kept Aaron Hernandez on scholarship. This was a whole new level of ignorance displayed by Cam and he has rightfully gotten hammered by the media for it all week. From a purely football perspective, Cam was great again yesterday, tossing for 350+ and 3 TDs. He appears to have returned to playing football at an MVP caliber level and winning in Detroit where Stafford and the Lions have been tough to beat is a quality W.

Our third dumbass of the weekend is Miami Dolphins offensive line coach Chris Foerster. Sure he looks dumb every Sunday as Jay Cutler takes a beating from opposing D-Lines, but letting this video out to the public is next level stupidity. For those who missed it, Foerster was seen in a one minute video chopping up and snorting “an unknown white powder” through a rolled up $20 bill. The Dolphins, who released a statement and have yet to punish Foerster are sticking with “unknown white powder” instead of any one of the hundreds of synonyms they have for cocaine down in South Beach. Foerster who is also seen speaking to the camera in the video, uttered “”Hey, I miss you. … Thinking about you. … How about me going to a meeting and doing this before I go.” in between lines. Clearly, Chris is living his best life down in Miami. Before this video became front page Miami Herald news, they would have been able to discuss the all time battle earlier in the day between Matt Cassel and Smokin Jay. Cassel continues to make Bill Belichick look that much smarter every time he takes the field in another uniform as he dinked and dunked the ball around to the tune of 140 yards passing. It is mind boggling that the Patriots won 11 games with him at QB and equally as mind boggling that he received that contract from Kansas City. Titans v Dolphins had absolutely no highlights to report on.

Two other horrible teams went head to head in Indianapolis, where again the main takeaway has nothing to do with football. In a completely staged and childish act of foolishness, Vice President Mike Pence left the game between his hometown Indianapolis Colts and the San Francisco 49ers before it started, because he was offended by players kneeling during the anthem. He felt the need to document this occasion in a series of tweets, featuring him and his wife at the game, and then leaving the game because “he will not dignify any event that respects our anthem”. Players were reportedly so distraught about him walking out, that they almost had to cancel the game. No, actually Mike, nobody cares that you left early, nor do they care about you being there in the first place. He is completely insane to think this move had any effect towards either side of this issue as he continues to act as nothing more than a puppet for Trump. Even more insane, is how wisely he continues to spend taxpayer money, as he flew from Las Vegas to Indy on Air Force One, bought an entire Suite at Lucas Oil Stadium and didn’t even stay to watch another magical performance by Jacoby Brissett and then flew home. Not that he ever had any intention of staying to watch a football game, as he knew the 49ers were in town, the team that started the movement of kneeling for the anthem in the first place. What a clown. President Trump has recently tweeted out that Pence is receiving great praise for leaving the game, therefore apparently considering nothing but his own twitter account to be great praise. We could go on and on about this issue, but really just hoping these guys will stay away from the NFL.

Back to football, Sunday Night was a highly anticipated game between the undefeated Chiefs and the Houston Texans. The Texans have been impressive ever since installing stud rookie QB Desaun Watson, and many thought they would take the next step at home against KC on the national stage. Those people were fools, and the Chiefs did whatever they wanted to Houston in a game that was never as close as its final score. Worse for the Texans, Houston’s hero JJ Watt went down in the first quarter with a broken leg. A really shitty injury and it is hard not to feel for JJ Watt, especially after what he did for the city of Houston following Hurricane Harvey. No one likes to see bad things happen to good people, and JJ has emerged as nothing short of a savior for the entire city, raising over $30 Million. Everyone with a heart hopes that injury is less serious than it appeared to be and everyone with eyes knows that defense is swiss cheese without him and Mercilus, who also went down last night, in the lineup. Alex Smith continues to tear it up and Kansas City continues its roll that has the 72 Dolphins tuning in nervously. Again, they will head into next week atop the all –important power rankings, and get the privilege of hosting Pittsburgh next week. And we get the privilege of watching the Giants play yet another primetime game on Sunday Night Football against the Broncos. Yay.